Swimsuit vending machines (and 4 more emergency swimsuits)
I love this:
The Standard Hotel -- in both Miami and Los Angeles -- has a vending machine that dispenses swimsuits. So if you forget your trunks at home (or they get confiscated by a lonely TSA official), you don't have to swim naked in the hotel pool anymore.
Andre Balazs Properties -- which also owns the Chateau Marmont on Sunset Boulevard in L.A. -- has partnered with Quiksilver
to offer bikinis, sunglasses, and board shorts by their Standard hotel pools. These emergency sunglasses cost $75, while the shorts cost $77 and the bikinis are $85.
According to the South Florida Sun-Sentinel, Quiksilver "designed four exclusive board short designs" to represent the four Standard hotels in Miami Beach, Manhattan, Hollywood, and Downtown L.A. Sure, the suits are a bit pricy, but at least the low-rise bikinis are reversal (flip 'em from white to yellow). You can watch a dreamy promo video for these swimsuits here.
Swimsuit vending machines? It's a brilliant idea that I'd love to see more hotels get in on.
But if you can't (or refuse to) pay so much for a relatively small amount of fabric, here are:
4 MORE LAST-MINUTE VACATION SWIMSUITS
#4) Hotel Lost & Found
If you're not too picky, tell a hotel staffer that you've lost your baggy board shorts. I guarantee they'll have a box of wretched, bleached-out shorts and Speedos that they'll be happy to unload on you. TIP: before you slip on used swim trunks, dunk them in the cholorinated pool. Kills all the scabies.
#3) Thrift Shop
You can score some fantastic cheap swimsuits at your nearest second-hand clothing store. And if their swimsuits are too small to fit your holiday bulge, just do what I did: buy Christmas-themed, stretch-waistband boxing shorts for just $2.99.
TIP: buy the brightest, loudest boxers you can find. The uglier the pattern, the less likely that people will notice you're wearing underwear.
For further inspiration, check out this fun song called Thrift Shop.
#2) Swimwear Boutique (online)
Buy a sexy swimsuit via Swimwear Boutique's online shop. They have tons of designers and fashions and the prices aren't too shabby. Pay a bit more and they'll deliver it to your hotel room overnight...provided you're in the continental USA, Hawaii, or Alaska (!).
#1) Alter your clothes
Assuming you didn't lose all your clothes, chop them into makeshift swimsuits.
WOMEN: Cut the bows off your bra and panties. If you want to get really fancy, steal plastic flowers from your hotel's buffet breakfast room and pin them to your bra strap.
MEN: Cut the legs off your denim jeans and transform them into jean shorts, a.k.a. jorts. Those never go out of style.
And if your travel buddies tease you for looking like a go-go dancer in a gay nightclub, prove how straight you are by wrestling them in the ocean.
Do you have more ideas for last-minute emergency swimsuits? Let me know in the comments below!
-- Ken Hegan
Bing: World's sexiest celebrity swimsuits
Read more of Ken’s MSN travel stories here
Follow Ken on Twitter: @KenHegan
Photos courtesy Quiksilver, Poko Pano swimsuits, iStock
Comments
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Posted by: matty | 2012-12-28 3:35:01 PM
Yeah, forgot your swimsuit, just get a small towel and a piece of string to make a loin cloth! lol
Posted by: Amber | 2012-12-28 11:15:19 PM
Or just do the smartest thing. Bring several bathing suits, and make sure they are tucked away in different pockets.. ex) front pocket of suit case, main part or suit case and in the carry on bag..
Posted by: Julie | 2013-01-02 2:17:40 PM
That was ridiculously sexist. Shame on you for your homophobic comments.